Home » Australia » Co-pilot Livesey

At 2:30, Pilot Bruce strode into the hostel wearing pristine white shorts and a neatly ironed blue shirt complete with winged epaulets. It felt like that Officer And A Gentlemen moment and I half expected 'Love Lift Us Up Where We Belong' to start magically playing out of nowhere and for Bruce to sweep me off my feet and carry me out....well, ok, maybe it wasn't quite like that, and at 13stone I'd have probably given old Brucey a hernia. More sensibly, we walked over to his car and headed over to the airstrip....a field.

Co-pilot Livesey

Ricklivesey
2006-08-31 11:47:21

Displayed times (last time: )

I was flying, not the plane!

...

That afternoon I'd been chatting to a really lovely Swiss guy called Martin and come the evening we fancied a wee bevvy, so headed off to the local tavern. It's taken me 6 months to finally get to what I'd consider a true Australian watering hole and 'The Agnes Water Tavern' was straight out of Crocodile Dundee. In one corner were a group of 5/6 huge, drunk, bearded farmhands complete with wife-beaters, (blue singlets), in another, high-heeled Shelias, dressed up to the nines with garish make-up collected in gaggles around the room, in the third, a large family with teen girls playing pool and on top of all this, incongruously, 4 bikini-clad babes in cowboy hats collecting glasses and starting drinking games with the multifarious masses! Amazingly in this hotpot of Aussie cliches, we couldn't have stood out more if we'd ordered glasses of Cinzano Fizz complete with umbrellas, so we armed ourselves with a takeaway box of Goon and left the locals to do their thing.

My bus wasn't due till 11:30 and a litre or 2 of white wine might make that 8hour journey to Mackay bearable. During the night of sitting outside, chatting to some lovely people, (3 lads: Owen(Irish), Stu(Scottish), Paul(Brummy), 2 girls: Gemma(English), Emma(Irish), 1 lad: Andy(Manc)), I found out that last night, while I was sleeping like a log, 3 Aussies had turned up at the hostel, helped themselves
Me and the icklest plane in the world Full Image
to the fridge contents and started picking on 3 burly Canadian hostlietes...something that even I could tell wasn't a good idea. After a sever pummeling there was the typically laddish post-fight handshake and offer to stay for a drink that was turned down before the natives crawled back to their homes. I miss all the fun!

Having escaped all the ruckus outside, I didn't manage the same inside, as sometime in the middle of the night our dorm was forced to listen to the couple next door humping away, (we were only separated by a flimsy partition wall that didn't even reach the ceiling!). Groans, moans, 'Yes!'s, 'Oh!'s, we got it all, and it wasn't pleasant. On the subject, it's amazing how many people think that sex in dorms is fine. IT ISN'T! Ok, if the dorm is empty, but when there are other people trying to get some shut-eye it's just gross. No amount of duvet-covering or even the hanging of towels from the top bunk to hide the horny occupants of the bottom bunk will make it acceptable. Call me a prude, but nothing freaks you out so much as when your dreams get side-tracked by humping
noises in the room, and while still asleep you start having sexy dreams to match the sounds, only to wake up and find that you're mentally piggy-backing your erotic thoughts off some completely random strangers in the next bed!

Eugh.

Nuff said.

Dont do it kids.